Thursday, February 27, 2014

26th Wedding Anniversary: Definitely more than I can bear.

I have often told people who were going through difficult situations that they must be strong, because God said He wouldn't give us more than we could bear, but they were going through incredible difficulties.  When people have said those same words to me, I always responded, either mentally or sometimes with spoken words, I am not strong.  I can't do this.  God DID give me more than I could bear.  Then the questions came about what God promised. 

What did He promise us?  Thankfully this week one of my children came back from a meeting at church where one of their peers made this statement:  God promised He would always give us an escape from TEMPTATIONS, that He would never put us in a situation where we would have no choice but to sin.  He has always told us that we would not be tempted beyond what we could bear.

...AND THERE IT WAS!!!  God NEVER PROMISED US THAT HE WOULD NOT GIVE US MORE THAN WE COULD BEAR IN BURDENS OR DIFFICULTIES!!!!  He wants us to see that we cannot do it alone.  There is no way.  Only He can get us through difficult times....NOT by anything we do or with our own strength!

This has given me such peace.  Let me explain.  Now when I said, fearing that I was saying things against God, how I could not go through this and that God gave me more than I could handle, I finally realize that is exactly what God says as well!  He wants us to come to Him, needing Him, with nothing of our own strength or ability.

So that's where I am today.  It's February 27th....26th wedding anniversary.  I miss Todd more than I could say.  I cannot go on another day without his presence.  I just can't.  I'm done.  It all hurts so much.  So I go to my Heavenly Father.  HE ALONE will get me through this day and the ones to follow.  Leaning heavy on Him today...    I miss you, Todd!  Love you still with all my heart.  I'd do anything to see you and hold you and hear you today.  Hard to believe this is the ninth anniversary without you.  We were supposed to grow old together.  So sad today, but resting in my Father's Faithful and Loving Arms, knowing this is definitely more than I can bear.